Thursday 3 March 2011

iPad Zero unveiled!

iPad Zero, it was inevitable.
Here it is, the shiny new iPad Zero, the cost-effective prequel destined for eager children in developing nations and the financially challenged in the post-credit crunch apocalypse of the west.

Revealed at some random digital technology conference in San Diego or something, Apple President; Steve Jobs was proud to present his latest device to a packed out auditorium of gullible fans with too much money to spend. As cameras flashed, nerdy voices dictated the descriptions of this latest groundbreaking technology into their dictaphones and jotted down their thoughts to blog online to the eager fans on the outside who couldn't watch the event being streamed live on their original iPad thanks to the Adobe Flash plugin that was required.

The iPad Zero features -

* Limited reams of pages, can be written upon with almost any pen or pencil device (sold separately).
* Ring bound wire technology to keep all pages secure, also permits easy turning thanks to circular ring design.
* Feint lined pages offers guidance for writing in straight lines.
* Automatic landscape mode provides 16:9 view for illustration purposes.
* Video feature in bottom right or left of page provides frame by frame animation flick book.
* Share your documents with friends and family even if they don't have an iPad Zero, by ripping the page off and giving it to them.
* Airplane mode allows Users to create paper airplanes and throw them around the room.
* Fits in the palm of your hand and weighs next to nothing.
* Latest "no battery" technology means that all documents are saved permanently and the iPad Zero can be used at any time and will never need to be charged.

The iPad Zero will ship immediately and will come in two versions; the 30 page "Lite" version ($499), and the 100 page "Smug amateur novelist" version ($7999).

Reservations have already begun and it's hotly tipped to be the top Ramadan gift of 2011, reserve yours now and be the envy of all your friends.

3 comments:

  1. Unfortunately, Apple have to approve everything you write on it.

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  2. Don't forget - you can Jailbreak your iPad Zero by removing the spiral binding and replacing it with treasury tags or some sort of ring binder clip.

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  3. hahaha love it so funny.. a friend of mine went to see you in bolton and just told me about you , does she invite me to come see you nooo!! (i shall be having words).. keep blogging your too funny

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